I love TV. I think it comes from my childhood during which, TV played a big part. We used to come home from school, throw our knapsacks in the entryway and race to get the best spot in front of the tv, or idiot box, as my mother was known to call it. (Just so you understand, the best spot was about 2 ft in front of the TV on a pulled up dining room chair. I must say it is a miracle that we are not all blind). When you were home sick from school, you would grab your blanket and lie down in the corner of the couch with the remote and watch for the whole day. I am pretty sure I faked quite a few illnesses just to enjoy that corner for a day here and a day there. The truth is, it is not just TV that I love, I love movies and reading as well. I think that what I like is to sit and lose myself in somebody else's story and troubles for a little while. I usually prefer fiction because then, when it is over I can leave it behind. I don't have to turn it off and continue to think about the people in the stories and wonder how their lives are today. When I watch a TV show, read a book or go to a movie, all I want is to turn off my own life and my own struggles for the duration of the story telling and be absorbed into their storyline.
The thing about these stories though, is that sometimes they mirror your life but the similarities get lost in the absurdities. What I mean is, that often I watch in disbelief, and think to myself "could the writers really be that stupid?". I remember in ninth grade my teacher teaching me the concept of "suspending your disbelief" when reading a fictional novel. These days, I ofter hear her voice (no idea what her name was anymore) repeating that line and I think to myself, she couldn't possibly have known how far fetched things would be in todays day and age. It is getting harder and harder for me to do this.
A few weeks ago a friend of mine suggested that I start watching Parenthood. My cousin was kind enough to let me use her Netflix account and so I started watching the first season. Before I continue, I will admit, that I have been completely drawn in and have stayed up way too late (anyone who knows me knows that means until 10 pm) on too many occasions because I keep having to watch "just one more episode". My friend was right, it is a good show. I am enjoying it. At the same time though, I keep thinking to myself, seriously? Are the writers that stupid?
Early on (in episode 1), we are presented with parents who have a son who is odd. I am guessing he is about 7 or 8 years old. I believe in episode 2 they find out that he has Aspergers. Not to knock anyone whose child is diagnosed on the later side of things but if your child has been wearing a pirate costume to school everyday for years it really shouldn't take you that long to figure out that something is not right.
Watching this show is like watching my life on speed in an alternate universe. It is as if they have the components but the picture is just not coming together. For example, in a single episode they manage to hire a behaviorist, on the first try she gets the kid to play a board game, go to the park with her and he makes a friend who he supposedly plays four square (no idea what that game is by the way) with, for two hours. Where do I start? Is it with the fact that in reality it can take a behaviorist weeks to gain a childs trust? Or that a child who has not had a friend ever does not suddenly play a game with a complete stranger for 2 hours or that no behaviorist in one day plays with the child at home, then at the park for two hours and then stays during dinner? Like I said, I like the show but I am having some trouble suspending my disbelief.
I think that what this highlights for me is what I often feel. When you are living in something and experiencing something unless someone is sitting in your seat they can't possibly really understand. They can listen, they can care, they can offer advice but they can not possibly really get it. This is true of any situation, not just the one I find myself living in. The writers of this show are attempting to mimic the life of a family dealing with this but truthfully, they just don't really get it. They can research it, they may have even spoken with families who deal with this but the storyline somehow leaves me wanting. Just like it was truly difficult to believe that Meredith Grey (of Grey's Anatomy) after drowning, could live with full brain function after having been dead for 3 hours, it is difficult to believe this entire story line.
I think what I am trying to say with this TV metaphor is that people don't get it. To be clear, I don't mean this in a negative way. It isn't their fault, honestly it is their blessing. I hope they never do have to get it. But still, often, it can be a lonely existence. It is lonely simply becuase while the people around you may really be trying to understand, they just can't.
In case you are wondering, yes I still watch Grey's Anatomy and yes I am still staying up too late enjoying Parenthood....
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